1. UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

    I don't know what to write. 

    So, I've never been emergency transferred. That's when you just get pulled out of your area in the middle of a transfer, and sent somewhere different. These last few days feel like that to me--like I'm getting emergency transferred. 

    FROM MY MISSION. 

    It's weird, man. 

    We received an exciting call from President! Sister Jeppesen is getting a new missionary!!!!!! We died. I took pictures. We probably screamed and jumped a lot? I am SO excited for her--training is a BLAST and she will rock it :D Then the Assistants called later to tell me that after much prayer and thought, they had decided to send me home. Elder Kress is having waaaaaay too much fun :P 

    The Jansens were baptized this Saturday, and received the gift of the Holy Ghost on Sunday!!! :D It was incredible. This is an older German couple that started getting invovled with the Church after an invitation from their neighbors, the Stellets. They've been consistantly coming to church for two years now! The missionaries have been working with them for almost the same amount of time. 

    I love these two so very much. Although I really only caught the tail end of their teaching, it has been wonderful to work with them :) Their baptism was wonderful as well--everything just felt so right and sure and peaceful and joyous ^.^ They were ready and excited, and our ward did a fantastic job of welcoming them in. They were confirmed as members of the Church the next day, and that experience mirrored that of their baptism--right and sure, peaceful and joyous. How wonderful! 

    That evening we visited them, and found in their home a different spirit; those same feelings I described earlier were there. I can't tell you how happy I am!! I adore them. Ah. I am going to miss them. They'll miss me too! At the close of the visit, Sister Jansen looked sternly at me and said something along the lines of "We'll see if you keep in touch...." That means "I love you," in German ;) Bruder Jansen gave a toast with sparkling wine (he brought out the bottle with that meme trololol expression--he paused as we took it in, then laughed and showed us the non-alcoholic sign :P BRUDER JANSEN. IMMER MIT DEN WITZEN.) 

    I love you all. 

    I just finished my mission history....people are here now, playing soccer at the church so ALL my focus has just disappeared.....but mission histories are great! I've been slowly writing it since I came to Düsseldorf, two transfers out from the end, just during a portion of p-day personal study. BEST IDEA EVER. Mine is long! I don't know how I wrote and summed up everything, but it was a cool chance to look back and see the changes. I am different. There have been so many priceless lessons out here. Haha, I wish I could just attach that to this letter! You'll have to let me know if you want to read it :) 

    I am really going to miss this. I'm trying to live it right and appreciate every moment--I've been praying that I'll appreciate every moment. It's working...this life is so good, and I will miss it. I'm going to love being home, though; I can't wait to see my family again :) 

    Liebe Grüße, 

    Sister Pitts
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  2. Hello everyone!!!! 

    Last weeks are weird. I feel like 5 foot 4 is too small to hold all these thoughts and feelings. 

    Keep going
    Pray!
    Listen
    Let go! 
    Tuna melt sandwich
    Neonatal nurse?
    CHEMISTRY OH NO PHYSICS
    Focus.
    Testify. 
    Be yourself! 
    Exit interview. 
    What kind of a missionary am I? 
    Pray.
    Book of Mormon
    Love
    That's a miracle.
    I see a choice! 
    Let it go.
    Recognize what you have here
    Avacado....
    Different way to feel the Spirit?
    Different way to work?
    Blessings


    That's like....a little itty bit of my mind lately.

    Needless to say, thinking has just been a different experience this
    last week....I think that's called trunky? The best option is just not
    to worry about it. DON'T THINK ABOUT IT :D

    It's just strange to think that next Saturday will be a white
    day....and the week after that and the week after that. But they'll be
    white days with my family :) Ethan and I are going to go get Talenti
    gelato!!

    Life is good. I feel really really good. Something clicked halfway
    through last week, and Sister Jeppesen and I have been living a
    charmed life. We see things differently--it's pretty neat when you
    start learning the lessons the Lord means for you to learn.

    I've learned that it's better to be a good servant than a good
    missionary. They ought to be the same thing, but I feel like I made
    them different, which is okay, because I got something out of it.
    There was too much worry that came with being a good missionary, for
    me. Being a good servant is something I've been taught how to do. And
    it's the answer to many prayers and fasts, so I'm sticking with it! :D

    I am really really happy to be here right now. This week we'll be
    losing two of our investigators to the waters of baptism :) I love
    them both, and I'm grateful to be a small part of this moment :)

    My eloquence is FAILING HARDCORE right now, I wish I could describe more, but guys--I'm a new person! I'm learning! Life is grand! I love EVERYTHING :D

    Peace out.

    Sister Pitts
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  3. ^^^ That is my week.

    Or the outcome of my week.

    It was a good week, a hard one, but something changed (probably me)
    and it seems like things'll move up now :) And you know, even if they
    don't, it'll be alright. That's the cool thing about religion, guys!
    You can literally go through anything.

    I am so blessed, though!! Prayer works. So does fasting. I'm learning.

    Hab euch lieb :)

    Sister Pitts


    Von meinem iPad gesendet
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  5. If you tell a German "Frohe Weihnachten", chances are they

    1) will get scared and jump a bit
    2) will recover and be super surprised and happy
    3) will return the wish with adorable joy

    Oh my goodness, I love Germans ^.^ It's wonderful to be here for
    Christmas again!!

    I don't really have much to say, but I DO want to let you all know
    that things are good. I'm learning FINALLY and so it's getting better.
    This will be a fantastic change.

    Fröhliche Weihnachten,

    Sister Pitts
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  6. SURPRISE!!! 

    We had a Zone Conference. I forgot to mention the tiny detail that we'd be switching P-day to accommodate that. 

    IT WAS SUCH A BLESSING :D 

    I try to be pretty up-front and honest in these emails home, and so I'd be lying to say that this week was That Rock Bottom Week. Something's funny, though; there's always a redemption moment before this message hits you all, so I'm not in the depths of despair anymore, I have a lesson :) 

    What's incredible is that across my mission I've had SO many hours, days, and weeks where things are dark and broken and hopeless, but there's been this knowledge instilled in me that something will come through, something will come out of it. I know know know that God wants us to be successful and happy, he wants us to be better because he has a surer knowledge of our potential. He does everything to help us get there, even to the point of giving us his Son. I'm unspeakably grateful for that gift that I've been given, knowing that all will be well, that no matter how trying it is, everything will work for our good and our betterment. 

    At the close of one of those trying days, my companion and I did something we'd done in the MTC--we each wrote down three questions and chose a random chapter of scripture to read. We landed on 3 Nephi 13, where the Savior is giving his Nephite version of the Sermon on the Mount. As we read through, verse by verse, it was beautiful to see the answers we each found. We talked together, making plans to change and plans to improve, plans to change our focus to trusting God and only worrying about how he feels about our work. Man. It was a cleansing moment. 

    And that was followed by the Conference, where we had the opportunity to be taught by the Spirit. Those lessons reinforced themselves. 

    I love my companion.

    President Stoddard is the best. 

    Elder Johnson from the Area Presidency did a fantastic job guiding our learning.

    God is good. 

    My progress doesn't stop after my mission ends.

    Merry Christmas :D

    Sister Pitts

    P.S. we saw the world's largest Christmas tree! 
    P.P.S. I promise I'm not super crazy and intense and learning dramatic life lessons all the time, I really do have funny stories and cool adventures--they are just all in my journal...you guys get all the drama ;D
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  7. Haha. This week was crazy...I'm not even sure what to say....I'm not exactly sure why it's hard, but I also know more than anything that Heavenly Father never lets us fail. He works endlessly to teach us how to succeed, and Christ provides us with everything needed to push us forward. The two of them are just super nice and sweet, and I'm glad we've gotten so close. Sometimes that "getting close" happens in rough ways, but I'm grateful for the opportunity. This message is going to be a little shorter on my talking-end, because I'd really like you all to take the five minutes it would last to read a snapshot from Düsseldorf and spend it a little bit differently.

    CUZ IT'S CHRISTMAS. 

    Hey everyone, let's just take a little trip on over to the coolest website ever--it will make your day, and will probably help you make the rest of them better as well, if you'd like. 


    Paste that in your browser, and go ahead and check out a few things, we'll do it together. You have my permission (missionaries too, this is worth it)--this would normally be Sister Pitts story time.

    Got it up? Sweet. Let's watch that video, shall we?

    Man, that was good :) I love that little boy from Africa, he's got a big spirit, doesn't he? If you feel happy right now, that's the Holy Ghost. Jesus=Holy Ghost being there=Feeling great.

    Okay! If you'd like, take a quick peek at Imagine a World Without a Savior--that's a little video that you'll find if you scroll down a bit. It's kinda sad for the first 45 seconds, because well, life without Jesus would be sad too. But then it gets better, and you feel that great happy feeling again. That's the Holy Ghost, remember?

    Oh my goodness, there's so much more! There's a cool little gif picture advents calendar thing with the story of Christ's birth, there's cool little music things that I am not actually sure if I can look at (but you can!) for the first days of December, there's cool little things that talk about why we need a Savior, and even a nice little social media dingsbums that I also don't know if I can do. But I did do one of the print-offs, and that'll be here attached (thanks Momma!) You should do one too! 

    If you felt that happy feeling, that really is the Holy Ghost. There actually is a God, and that's how he speaks to us. That feeling can stay, I know it can--it stays when we do things that help us get to know Christ. I invite you to act, because it'll make you happier than you are right now :) If you want ideas of what to do, find your local missionaries, they can help you! 

    It's worth it.

    Liebe Grüße, 

    Sister Pitts
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  8. Can you believe it? I feel like January was just a only a few weeks
    ago, and now December is just a breath away.

    Ah, my friends, I am so happy right now :) I'm really lucky to have
    such a companion as I do--she is very patient with me and takes me on
    adventures and helps me to chill out a bit. SUPER LUCKY.

    God does those three things for me as well.

    If there was a theme throughout this week, it would be to take it
    easy! Sometimes I forget that I don't run the show :P Giving your all
    isn't necessarily connected to the outcome. It's really interesting, I
    saw so very clearly (haha, eventually) how God's plan spins just a
    little differently than ours! Or sometimes God's plan is pretty much
    the opposite.

    I don't know, I feel like I re-learn this lesson every so often, but
    REALLY, if you are doing all you can, listening real close, and acting
    accordingly, everything will be okay! If there's something I've
    noticed about myself lately, it's that I don't adjust my
    vision/plan/expectation very well. It's a mindset that really touched
    every part of my working: with finding people who want to be taught,
    with traveling from place to place, with strengthening the
    congregation here, studying, and even ideas of what my future will be
    like (fun, na?). It's really funny, this is how the progression goes:
    I form my vision, work work work for it, something throws it off, I
    get thrown off and stressed and anxious and BOOM I am literally
    immobilized as a missionary! Cut off! No more of that epic peaceful
    confident trusting missionary spirit feeling--instead I feel static.
    That static feeling has done a wonderful job of teaching me this week,
    though, because it's something I wanted to retreat from as soon as it
    came!

    I'm still working on it, this whole "trusting God" thing. But it's
    been wonderful to see those incredibly clear moments where I could
    almost shout to the sky, "Ah ha! There you are!! I saw that!" When
    people ask me how I know there's a God, I ought to just take them
    through a day in my life here. Man. I wish you could have all been
    there, watching my Friday--Heavenly Father stopped the world for a
    girl named Lydia. It was dark and windy and at an obscure train
    station, but he stopped the world to make sure his little girl knew he
    was there in her moment of crisis. That's pretty much the sweetest
    thing ever, I think :) And then he stopped the world again so we could
    help her receive a priesthood blessing the next day. He's quiet, but
    he's definitely there, and most assuredly takes part in our lives.

    I'm still working on letting go, on being myself, on believing. I'm
    really grateful for the chance learn these lessons, I love it here :)

    If you want to explore more of this idea of God's relationship to his
    children, take a peek at this little video--weihnachten.mormon.org. If
    you like it, gebt es weiter!

    Liebe Grüße,

    Sister Pitts

    P.S. We made probably the most perfect-looking pumpkin pie for weekly
    planning but said pie tasted more like molasses than pumpkin and we
    had a consequential break-down that involved stabbing a summer squash.
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  9. I don't have a lot of time, but this week was cool....lots of weird
    things happened, but lots of good things too, but the end was the
    best.

    It's cool, because we're both changing, Sister Jeppesen and I, and
    good things are happening. My desire to let go and just act how the
    Lord wants me to act is getting stronger, overriding that desire to do
    what I've always done and be like I've always been. I'm filled with
    hope!

    We had miracles happen at church, and also through the week. Familie
    Boeving came and loved the Primary Program, and our preparation with
    the members paid off wonderfully! Mina came as well, with her little
    daughter, who wanted to be with the other children, so she joined them
    on the stand for the program. Mina's looking into the church so her
    daughter can have a Christian influence, so she was really touched to
    see her little one up there waving at her :D She kept saying, "Ah,
    this is nice, this is so nice!" throughout the meeting :)

    The fire department broke our door down to stop a defective fire
    alarm....which led to an exciting night of finding a mangled door and
    having to go to the police to obtain our new keys....and arriving back
    home at 1 in the morning. Haha, I love adventuring :D

    Love you all,

    Sister Pitts
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  10. I think I am more tired than I could have ever imagined. 

    Here's an idea, someone should do a scientific study on energy levels of missionaries and should then get the result that it's just not possible! I feel like it's not possible. God is doing a LOT to keep me going. Haha, he does everything for me. 

    This week was strange, because though it felt discouraging and empty, it was quite the opposite. We realized yesterday that we've been seeing these days through a lens--like those colored glasses that make everything seem red or green or blue. It's perfectly normal to have discouraging days or times, ones where you don't feel super perky and not all that "let's do this!" but this was lasting, not going away! We had a lens of hopelessness, and we couldn't take it off. 

    I'm going to pull a Lucas Hobbs and take you through this week:

    Montag
    BAD. I didn't even write in my journal cuz it made me sad to think about the day....every appointment fell out, contacting went poorly, both of us were stressed and anxious out of our minds (did you know it's impossible to feel the Spirit when you're stressed?), and yeah. But the day ended with a semi-break-down, with one of our Zone Leaders teaching us how to meditate over the phone. Meditation's rad. Don't worry, the rest of the week is okay after this :)

    Dienstag
    Two more fallen-out appointments, BUT an epic activity with the Zone Leaders to try and find people to teach. It was great, we got right back into the swing of talking and loving and sharing. Had lunch with the BEST Döner I've had in Germany (it had carrots and eggplant and olives and a whole bunch of other weird veggies, as well as the famous red sauce I heard so much about from Sister Williams!), and we met a cool guy at the stand that wants to come to church! We walked around later that evening and talked to people on the way from Oberbilk to Düsseldorf, and felt like super-missionaries again! I took a video to celebrate. Had a lesson with Achmad, an Uni student here that has noticed positive things from his Christian friends, and wants to learn more about our church. We discovered that we need to teach the Restoration better.

    Mittwoch
    Fallen-out appointment, but got to visit the member that was joining us to teach. Traveled up early to Kaiserswert to talk to folks since we had some extra time, met a COOL BRO with dreds and piercings and I believe we are soul brothas. Had a good conversation about God and change and commandments. Visited with the new Relief Society president, who's American, and has only been here a few months! She doesn't speak German, but she's doing incredible in her calling! We went through the ward, made a plan of how to work, discussed areas that need help, and got to hear her son's experiences of being the only kid in his school with a belief in God. Met Mairead on the ride back, cute Irish lady that was INCREDIBLY sweet, and wanted to know what we thought happened after death. We're seeing her this week! Met with Jennifer for fifteen minutes, got someone's mail, then found a sister's address, then visited with probably the cutest old German couple I've ever seen. Ask me more about that later, it was precious :)

    Donnerstag
    Had a meeting with the other missionaries in our district, our opening and closing hymns sounded like the King's Singers because MAN our district has some pipes! A role-play on teaching the Restoration taught us that we really need to focus on improving our teaching--I worry too much when I teach it, and love it too little. Appointment right after fell out, BUT that meant that we got to eat lunch. Visited (and were greatly spiritually strengthened) by our next visit, with Sister Schem, who has a testimony bigger than anything. We talked about prayer, and how it can dedicate all that we do, so everything works the way it's supposed to, no matter what! Another appointment fell out afterward, but we got to talk to people a lot instead. And eat dinner :) 

    Freitag
    Had an appointment with a sweet sister in our ward to help plan for an activity and share a thought. She's an angel-lady, but has a REALLY bad negative-talker in her head--how do you help someone see how great they are? Helped Sister Richter move (they got lost finding the car while we packed the apartment up (missionaries are really good at packing efficiently! Tetrus!). Walked to the Happi family afterward and only talked to one person on the way there (this hopelessness lens was real bad then). FANTASTIC lesson with this family, some stellar kids that are wiser beyond their years, and very spiritual in a simple, child-like way. Felt the Spirit :) Tried once more to get in contact with a family we'd met, and set up an appointment for the following day!

    Samstag
    Mental break-down in studies in regards to teaching the Restoration, role-plays weren't working! Got a Spirit-inspired idea of how to change everything, and it worked--God is a genius. Ask me about that later. Prep for cleaning checks, weekly planning afterward. Called Sister Dürr to see if she could come teach with us at our first appointment with this family, she would have loved to, but she wasn't sure if she'd make it back in time from her family get-together. We called Larissa, a month-fresh returned missionary, and she was able to join us. Went to the lesson, and there is honestly too much to write about it, but it was hands-down one of my favorite mission moments. Sister Dürr ended up making it by surprise, and was incredibly valuable while teaching! She loved it! Beautiful lesson, incredible incredible incredible. Finished weekly planning.

    Sonntag
    Church! No one in Relief Society can play hymns, so they were pretty happy to know that I can whip something out of the hymn book every once and a while--surprise accompanist! The teacher for the Investigator class wasn't there, and the Zone Leaders had to run to give a blessing, so we took the lead--surprise teachers! Then the
    translator (it's a thing here, there's a lot of English-speaking folks in this ward) wasn't there so I was asked to do that--surprise translator! (Translating is...something this Annie-mind can't do). I got to get to know a few more members, got to see one of our sisters that's having a rough time make it to the meeting, and got to partake
    of the sacrament. After church we headed to an appointment, and there realized the lens of hopelessness was in fact just a perception we'd been given, and not reality.

    We'd spent this whole week feeling pretty worthless and inadequate, frustrated, stressed, and just plain sad and empty. But it was, in actuality, an incredible week, as you all can see! It helped me to write it out, that solidified it for me. Yesterday evening we got to talk and figure out how to change that (I prayed like Nephi and asked what I needed to do to change and get out of this and felt like I should take a look in my scriptures--found Doctrine and Covenants 50:16, which is a funny answer, if you want to look it up! The surrounding scriptures provided a more helpful direction :)) We found out ways to have the Spirit more with us! We're going to be okay.

    Liebe Grüße,

    Sister Pitts
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